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Home » News » DAILY DIRT: Next time you’re in the bathroom, think about this…
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DAILY DIRT: Next time you’re in the bathroom, think about this…

June 22, 2022 — by Steve Eighinger, Muddy River News Minister of Culture and Doctor of Love

Daily Dirt for Wednesday, June 22, 2022

The bathtub thing in the first thought absolutely boggles my mind … Welcome to today’s three thoughts that make up Vol. 318 of The Daily Dirt.

1. Here are five kind of wacky — and hopefully entertaining — facts gleaned from various medical sources:

  • Spread across their lifetime, most people spend an average of one whole year sitting on the toilet.
  • The arteries of the blue whale — the largest living creature on earth — are so big that a full-sized human being could swim through them.
  • Like fingerprints, every person has a unique tongue print.
  • You produce about 40,000 liters of spit in your lifetime. Or to put it another way, enough spit to fill around 500 bathtubs
  • The average nose produces about a cupful of nasal mucus every day.

2. The following items were “Found on Facebook” this week:

  • At times I’m grateful that thought bubbles do not appear over our heads.”
  • “Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins on the ice in Antarctica?”
  • “The funeral for the man who invented Tupperware was postponed because the right lid could not be found for his coffin.”
  • “So I tried to come up with a carpentry pun that woodwork. I think I nailed it but nobody saw it.”
  • “If your guy doesn’t appreciate fresh fruit puns, let that mango.” (My favorite.)
Chris Kattan as Mango with Garth Brooks on SNL. (NBC)

3. The late hall of fame outfielder, Tony Gwynn, was an incredible hitter who probably never receiver all the credit he was due.

Baseball fans, did you know:

  • With two strikes, Gwynn had an MLB career-best batting average of .302. Wade Boggs is a distant second at .262.
  • Five times he hit above .350. He’s the only player to do that since World War II.
  • He struck out just 14 times in 1999, the fewest by any player with at least 400 at-bats in 46 years.
  • Only once his career did he strike out as many as three times in a game.
  • Padres fans have long called the second game of the season, “Tony Gwynn Opening Day,” because of Gwynn’s affection for the fans who showed up for Game 2. Nobody owned “Tony Gwynn Opening Day” quite like, well, Tony Gwynn. He batted .403 in Game 2’s for his career.

Steve Thought O’ The Day — A cup of mucus each day? Wow.

Steve Eighinger writes daily for Muddy River News. You know you’re old when you’re writing about poop and mucus.

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Filed Under: Opinion Tagged With: Facebooks, Mango, mucus, Steve Eighinger, Toilets, Tony Gwynn

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