Daily Dirt: Real issues. Real answers. The Doctor of Love comes callin’

There’s no question too tough for Stevie Love … welcome to Vol. 163 of the Daily Dirt.

Ho! Ho! Ho! Look who’s back! It’s Love. Stevie Love. For 14 years, the potentate of passion, the emperor of embrace and the rajah of romance has been close at hand to better help you navigate the aches of the heart and your trips through the wilderness of wonderment.

Dear Stevie Love: I know I should have more of the holiday spirt, but I am at my wit’s end with my husband, Darcy. All he seems to do is want to watch NASCAR reruns and college football. He says he’s sad because racing season is months away and that college football is almost over. Every night after he gets home from work it is nothing but hour after hour of Chase Elliott, Kyle Busch and Joey Logano, and then another replay of the 1997 Gator Bowl when North Carolina beat West Virginia. The only time he leaves his recliner is to come fill up his plate with the food I worked so hard to make — and never hear a thank you for … it’s frustrating, Stevie, and I just want to cry. What’s a girl to do?Sincerely,
Mia in West Quincy

Dear Mia: I think you’re missing big picture here, Marriage is supposed to be a 50-50 venture, and it sounds like you and Darcy have nailed it. You fix the food, he eats it. Bingo!! The rest of the marriage is simply frosting on the cake. Have a happy holiday!

Dear Dr. Love: My husband, Kenny, is not exactly what you would call motivated or outdoor-oriented. For example, over the past few weeks I have been cleaning up our yard, raking leaves and sticks and bagging up all the miscellaneous crap. I even drag the bags to the curb for the garbage collectors. And what’s Kenny doing? Usually he’s either napping in his favorite chair or watching reruns of “Wagon Train” and “Rawhide”. Do I have a right to be upset? Sincerely, Sarah in Marblehead

Sarah: This one’s easy. Tell Kenny to get off his deadbeat bottom, drive to Menard’s and buy you either a new or bigger wheelbarrow. It will make getting those bags to the curb much easier. Have a blessed holiday!!!

Mr. Love: First-time writer here. The reason I am writing is I have been so impressed with your responses in the past I felt I needed to ask for help. A few weeks ago, I met “the guy of my dreams” and I finally got up the nerve to ask him if he’d like to go out to dinner or something. Nothing fancy, just hanging out. He said he couldn’t, because he had to “wrench a car,” but he asked if we could go out another evenbing, that he would really like that. Should I be mad? Is he just blowing me off? Puzzled in Pittsfield, Kallie Jo

Dear Kallie: Are you kidding? This is a “car guy”. He needed to work on a vehicle, to be one with a quarter panel. He’s definitely a keeper, Kallie. This could be your soulmate.

Real issues. Real answer. Until the next time, the Doctor of Love wishes you and yours the happiest of holidays!!!

Stevie Love’s 3 Romantic Tips for Ultimate Happiness

What every good woman should know to keep her good man happy:

• 1. Never interrupt your significant other during the final 50 laps of a NASCAR race or from the seventh inning on in a baseball game.
• 2. Always make sure you have a good supply of his favorite chips and soft drink on hand.
• 3. Make certain there is an ample amount of ice — preferably cubed, not crushed — in the freezer.

Dr. Stevie Love makes periodic appearances in Muddy River News. He has succeeded in marriage by trying, and trying, and trying again.