DAILY DIRT: If you’re traveling abroad, just forget about the ranch dressing and those extra glasses of water

November 9, 2024 | By Steve Eighinger, MRN Minister of Culture and Doctor of Love

No ranch dressing in Europe? What's the point of going over there then?

Daily Dirt for Saturday, Nov. 9, 2024

I do like the idea of having all the necessary taxes included in a posted price, but for me to travel to Europe the foreigners are going to have to rethink the air conditioning thing … Welcome to today’s three thoughts that make up Vol. 1,109 of The Daily Dirt.

1. If you’re planning on traveling abroad in the near future, you should realize day-to-day life can be much different in a foreign land.

Here’s just a few of the items you may find rather bizarre when traveling through most foreign lands:

Ranch dressing is a standard condiment in almost every U.S. restaurant, but most foreigners have never even heard of it.

Free refills of coffee, Coke or whatever are common and expected in U.S. eateries, but just the opposite is true in other countries. If you want a second cup of coffee, or even a second glass of water, be prepared to pay.

Takeout boxes in restaurants are virtually a no-no to even inquire about. Compared to the rest of the world, American portions are huge and customers often ask for a to-go container of some sort. In foreign countries, this is extremely rare and considered impolite.

Prices excluding tax are commonplace in only America. Foreign price tags have the tax included. No surprises at the cashout as far as a final total is concerned.

Surprisingly, mailboxes are only common in America. In most other countries, the mailman delivers the mail through slots in the front door.

The way Americans write the month and date, such as Dec. 8, would be done in 8 December fashion foreign lands.

College sports are huge in America, both in-person and on TV. In foreign countries, they are more of a pastime, with no crowds or media coverage.

While commonplace in the U.S., air conditioning is a rarity in foreign countries. Only a handful of citizens in those foreign countries have A.C. in their homes. A.C. is also rare in hotels and most public buildings.

Drug stores that sell more than … well, drugs, are only found in the U.S. Want to pick up a carton of Mountain Dew and some chips after you get your prescription? When abroad, you’ll have to go somewhere other than the drug store to do that.

2. Did you know (Part 181)

That in 1965, the Chicago Bears drafted TWO future Hall of Famers in the first round when they landed linebacker Dick Butkus and halfback Gale Sayers.
That the official name for nephews and nieces is “niblings”. Aunts and uncles are “piblings”. (For the record, my grandkids are all Dirtlings.)
That humans, on the average, blink their eyes 15 to 20 times per minute.
That the human heart averages 115,000 beats per day.
That the proper terminology for a five-year period is a lustrum.

3. How about this idea for new NFL divisions, both in names and participating teams?

For the most part, the idea is sound:
Great Lakes East: Detroit, Cleveland, Buffalo, Pittsburgh.
Great Lakes West: Chicago, Green Bay, Minnesota, Indianapolis.
Atlantic: Atlanta, Miami, Jacksonville, Tampa Bay.
Mid-Atlantic: Washington, Baltimore, Cincinnati, Carolina.
Northeast: New England, New York Giants, New York Jets, Philadelphia.
South: Dallas, Houston, New Orleans, Tennessee.
Big Sky: Arizona, Denver, Kansas City, Las Vegas.
Pacific: Los Angeles Chargers, San Francisco, Seattle, Los Angeles Rams.

Steve Thought O’ The Day — As far as that NFL realignment is concerned, I’d like to see Cincinnati bumped to the Great Lakes East, Buffalo moved to the Northeast and Philadelphia dropped down to the Mid-Atlantic.