DAILY DIRT: Breakdancing, skateboarding, kayak cross … here come the Paris Olympics!

June 25, 2024 | By Steve Eighinger, Muddy River News Minister of Culture and Doctor of Love

I once considered a career as a breakdancer, but decided I enjoyed snacking much, much more … Welcome to today’s three thoughts that make up Vol. 988 of The Daily Dirt.

1. The Paris Olympics are right around the corner, beginning Friday, July 26.

That gives us roughly a month to plan exactly what we want to watch.

Might I offer a few events that will either be new to the Olympics, or being revived? I would suggest to start planning for:

Breaking: Breaking, or breakdancing, will make its Olympic debut at the Paris Games, and I think this could be huge. Those who are enthralled by the figure skating (which is always boffo box office in the TV ratings) will likely be drawn to breakdancing, the urban dance style that originated in the 1970s in New York City. For those unfamiliar, It is characterized by intricate footwork, rapid movements and impressive spins and flips. I wouldn’t be shocked if the networks put some (or all) of this on in prime time.

Skateboarding: Skateboarding returns to the Olympics after a successful debut in Tokyo. Competitors will have a choice of two disciplines: park and street. In the park competition, skaters will be scored on their height, speed, and agility as they navigate the course’s obstacles and surfaces. Each contestant will have three 45-second runs, with the best counting as his/her final score.

In street skateboarding, athletes will tackle a specially created flat urban street with stairs, handrails, and other features. Each athlete will have two 45-second runs to perform five tricks. They will be evaluated based on their board control, trick variety and overall style.

Kayak cross: Under the canoe slalom umbrella, the event of kayak cross is set for its Olympic debut in Paris. In kayak cross, four athletes race against each other from a ramp above the water. They traverse a course featuring up to six downstream gates and two upstream gates in what is likely to be a thrilling showdown. This marks the first time at an Olympics that canoe slalom features an event in which athletes race against each other, not just the clock.

Don’t worry, we’ll be having a lot more on the Olympics in the upcoming days. Unless the Cardinals or Cubs get hot in the coming weeks, the Olympics might provide a nice alternative in the evenings.

2. Did you know (Part 47)

That “gnurr” is the proper term for lint that collects in the bottom of your pockets.
That humans produce between 0.5 and 1.5 liters of saliva each day.
That “buttload” is an actual unit of measurement. One buttload equals 126 gallons of wine.
That there are more fake flamingoes (pink, I presume) than there are real ones.
That as long as you legally obtain human flesh or limbs, cannibalism is permitted in The Netherlands.