Daily Dirt: ‘Cheat on your girlfriend, not your workout’…and other bad ad slogans

Daily Dirt for Jan. 17, 2022

I never thought the word “commando” would ever make it into the Daily Dirt, but it’s a new era, or so publishing czar J. Robert Gough tells me. That said, here are the three thoughts that make up Vol. 185 of the Daily Dirt.

1. Here’s three more strange advertising campaigns from the past decade that you may or may not remember. None were around too long, for obvious reasons.

Really Bad: Ten years ago, Reebok rolled out this dud — “Cheat on Your Girlfriend, Not Your Workout”. We’ll give Reebook a few points for attempting to be funny, but not many. Bad, bad. bad.

Kind of Bad: “It’s Not For Women” … was the goal of this 2011 Dr. Pepper advertising campaignto alienate half of all consumers? Maybe attempting to capitalize on reverse psychology? Or did Dr. Pepper officials simply envision their soft drink to be hyper-masculine? There is no correct answer, simply because there is no correct answer. And, yes, this ad campaign was a total bomb.

Actually, pretty good: “Go Cottonelle, Go Commando!” … Toilet paper ads can get pretty weird, and this 2015 Cottonelle campaign was no exception. The concept behind the slogan was to get a little more intimate than the average consumer would like to with their toilet paper brand. Major kudos, though, because the campaign did actually boost sales.

The above three were chosen from the urbanmatter.com website. Snarky comments were provided by your favorite Ohio State football fan.

2. My favorite country female singers/girl groups from the 1990s:

• 1. Shania Twain: For a few years, the sun actually rose and set with Shania.
• 2. Lorrie Morgan: The top voice of any of these singers … who didn’t love that deep, raspy heartbreak? Shania beats her out for No. 1 on the strength of overall musical selections, showmanship and stage presence, but Lorrie was an incredible talent in her own right at this point in her career.
• 3. Dixie Chicks: Yeah, I know. Now they’re just The Chicks. They were one sweet group until they felt the world actually cared about their political convictions.
• 4. Faith Hill: You can catch her these days on “1883” on the Paramount-Plus network.
• 5. Trisha Yearwood: Her 1991 single “She’s In Love With The Boy” remains an all-time classic.
• 6. Reba McIntire: At one time, Reba was the absolute queen of country.
• 7. Martina McBride: My favorite Martina contribution is “My Baby Loves Me”.
• 8. Deana Carter: Best Deana song? How about “Did I Shave My Legs For This?”
• 9. SHeDAISY: Often overlooked, never outperformed.
• 10. Mary Chapin Carpenter: Some don’t include her in the country genre, and I’m 100 percent sold myself, but I love her music and I make the rules here, so welcome, MCC.

3. More license plates for your enjoyment, founding roaming the streets and parking lots in West-Central Illinois and Northeast Missouri:

Gold medal: SOLD ON U. This could go several directions, but I’m banking it belongs to a real estate agent.

Silver Medal: AIR USA. Has to be a pilot, right?

Bronze medal: BLUES 3. Mom, dad and son or daughter who are huge St. Louis hockey fans?

Steve Fact O’ The Day Steve’s choice of toilet paper comes down to one thing: Price.

Steve Eighinger writes daily for Muddy River News. He yells “Hello, clean bottom!”, when he’s done with his business.