DAILY DIRT: Despite the heat, summer is still much better than shoveling snow and hoping your car will start

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Daily Dirt for Friday, June 17, 2022


While summer is more desirable than winter no matter how warm it gets, it’s OK to admit it’s still not much fun when have to walk outside in a sultry 90-degree June afternoon … Welcome to today’s three thoughts that make up Vol. 314 of The Daily Dirt.

1. Yep, it’s been kind of warm for a few days.

I refuse, however, to officially complain about the heat. All I do is remind myself what it will likely be like six months from now — snow on the ground, slippery roads and sidewalks to shovel. No thanks to all three.

So when you walk outside later today and feel suffocated by the humidity and break into an immediate sweat, just be thankful it’s not mid-January and your car won’t start, you can’t see out the living room window because it’s coated in ice and the furnace is kicking on about 15 minutes.

In the meantime, though, I think the following three anonymous quotes pretty well sum up the way we’ve all been approaching most of this week. One look at the nearest outdoor thermometer and some — or all — of the following thoughts are bound to bounce through your brain:

Gold medal: “I gotta get my life together. This damn heat wave has made me realize I can’t go to hell.”

Silver medal: “It’s hard to argue with someone who does not believe in global warming.”

Bronze medal: “The heat index is somewhere between OMG and WTF.”

2. This week’s musical spotlight year is 1986.

How many of these Billboard top 10 songs from 36 years ago still bring a smile to you?

1. “That’s What Friends Are For,” by Dionne Warwick and Friends: I have always been a big fan of Dionne’s. I always thought she was overshadowed far too much by Aretha Franklin.

2. “Say You, Say Me,” by Lionel Richie: The best move Lionel Richie ever made was leaving the Commodores and going solo.

3. “I Miss You,” by Klymaxx: Arguably the finest romantic song of the entire year.

4. “On My Own,” by Patti Labelle and Michael McDonald: Yawn …

5. “Broken Wings,” by Mr. Mister: I have always felt this was the far lesser of the group’s two major hits. The band’s best song was easily “Kyrie” a few of notches south of this.

6. “How Will I Know,” by Whitney Houston: Unquestionably, this should have Been No. 1.

7. “Party All The Time,” By Eddie Murphy: Just a stupid song and waste of time. Eddie should have been concentrating on making better movies.

8. “Burning Heart,” by Survivor: Another yawn …

9. “Kyrie,” by Mr. Mister: This should have been No., 2 behind the Whitney Houston classic.

10. “Addicted To Love,” by Robert Palmer: We were ALL addicted to that video.

These were songs that should have been in the top 10: 

No. 11. “The Greatest Love Of All,” by Whitney Houston; No. 12. “Secret Lovers,” by Atlantic Starr; No. 15. “West End Girls,” by the Pet Shop Boys; No. 30. “You Give Love A Bad Name,” by Bon Jovi.

3. The latest and greatest of “Found on Facebook:

“A pessimist sees a dark tunnel. An optimist sees light at the end of the tunnel. A realist sees a freight train. The train driver sees three idiots standing on the tracks”.

“Lord, stretch my gas the way you did two fish and five loaves of bread.”

“If it’s not gonna matter in five years, don’t spend more than five minutes being upset by it.”

“When you really want to slap someone, just do it and yell, ‘Mosquito!'”

“Where do I apply for fuel stamps?”

Steve Thought O’ The Day — I may have to try that mosquito thing.

Steve Eighinger writes daily for Muddy River News. He forgot to mention that he also prefers summer because of racing and baseball.

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