Daily Dirt: Ethan Hunt, Jason Bourne or Jack Ryan … and don’t forget Billy Ray Cyrus

Vol. 91 of the Daily Dirt allows us to have some more fun — and conversation — about one of the day’s hottest topics: secret agents. Feel free to join in with today’s three thoughts:

1. So, with the release of the new James Bond film, “No Time to Die,” and all of the potential Oscar talk surrounding it, it’s a given that 007 has cemented the No. 1 position among the all-time best secret agents the movies have provided us.

But who would rank behind Bond? (Good question, right?!)

Here are my choices for the top three non-Bond agents the silver screen has gifted us:

A. Ethan Hunt: Hunt is another Tom Cruise action/adventure vehicle. It’s one that has successfully carved out a niche in the spy game for Hunt in those high-budget “Mission: Impossible” films. “There’s always the sense that (Hunt) is in the spy game merely for the thrill of the chase,” assessed writer Ryan Lambie in 2018. Just a thought here … I wonder why we’ve never heard Cruise’s name mentioned as a potential Bond? I’m not saying it would — or would not — be a great choice, I’m just curious why he’s never been in the conversation.

B. Jason Bourne: I don’t think the Bourne (Matt Damon) series has produced one signature film, but the five movies have been a methodically entertaining series and demand you have a background in film espionage before tackling them, and I appreciate that. Surprisingly, Bourne films have been around since 2002. 

C. Jack Ryan: Five actors have portrayed Ryan, but the best has been Harrison Ford. In many ways, Ryan is the anti-Bond. Although we are led to believe Ryan is equally adept in weapons, martial arts and the ability to kill and maim in numerous fashions, Ryan (or at least Ford’s interpretation) is basically more of a graduate of the spy-with-a-family genre, rather than the Sean Connery-esque model from the suave and debonair department. 

Honorable mention: I’m not sure Jack Reacher (Cruise) counts as a secret agent in the truest film sense, but he does have a special ops background and does a lot of cool spy stuff. If a third Reacher film is ever done, I may have to move him into medal consideration.

2.If I had it to do all over again, here are five singers whose concerts I would have attended when they were in their prime:

• Billy Ray Cyrus. At one time, no singer was more popular. But flame is a fleeting thing. Here’s my favorite Billy Ray Cyrus songs, which I still play regularly, thanks to YouTube: “I Know The Words By Heart,” “It Could Have Been Me,” “Some Gave All.” I know every comma,Every question mark.No, I don’t have to look,I know the words by heart.

• Whitney Houston. I think she could have ultimately been regarded as the No. 1 female vocalist of all-time … if she had never met Bobby Brown. So sad. Fortunately, we’ll always have those marvelous songs from her early days. My favorites: “I Wanna Dance With Somebody,” “So Emotional,” “I Will Always Love You.”

• Tina Turner. Remember when Turner, now 81, played Auntie Entity in 1985’s “Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome”? Here’s my personal Tina picks: “Better Be Good To Me,” “Private Dancer,” “What’s Love Got To Do With It.”

• Crystal Gayle. For those who never knew, her real name is Brenda Gail Webb and she is Loretta Lynn’s younger sister. Best efforts: “Baby What About You,” “Why Have You Left The One You Left Me For,” “Talking In Your Sleep.”

• George Strait. Incredibly, Strait has been credited with 60 No. 1 hits. Three of my faves: “I Cross My Heart,” “You Look So Good In Love,” “It’s A Love Without End, Amen.”

Honorable mention: Stevie Nicks, Barbara Mandrell, Janie Fricke, Dwight Yoakam.

3. A few weird things to contemplate, in honor of the ongoing MLB playoffs:

• The Cleveland Indians were no-hit four times this season, three nine-inning games and one of those goofy seven-inning jobs. (In comparison, the New York Yankees have been no-hit ONCE in the past 60 years.)

• The Indians’ Zach Plesac was the losing pitcher in all three of the nine-inning no-nos. (The only other MLB pitcher to be on the losing end of three no-hitters was Jim Perry, who also pitched for the Indians, and that troika took 17 years to come to fruition.)

• San Diego Padres reliever Austin Adams pitched 48.2 innings this season — and hit 23 batters. Twenty-three!! That was the most batters hit by a pitcher in 99 years. Howard Ehmke is 23 batters in 279.2 innings in 1922.

Steve Fact O’ The Day

Growing up, Steve was once known as “Thunderball.”