DAILY DIRT: Long live ‘Frozen Dead Guy Days’

This is one cool concept. No pun intended … Welcome to today’s three thoughts that make up Vol. 634 of The Daily Dirt.

1. The Colorado town of Nederland may have the strangest, funniest and most unique celebration in the world.

Located about 17 miles west of Boulder, the town boasts a plastic utility shed with the body of a long-dead Norwegian man kept packed in dry ice. It turns out the deceased and his offspring were big believers in cryonics, wherein dead bodies are kept in a deep freeze, awaiting future medical advances that could allow them to be brought back to life. 

There was a problem, however, for this particular dead body. The daughter and grandson who had been caretakers for the frozen man since 1993 came upon hard times and both returned to Norway. The town of Nederland, seeing an opportunity for offbeat fame, took up the cause of keeping the late Mr. Bredo Morstol from thawing. In 2003, they began to celebrate their local stiff with “Frozen Dead Guy Days,” an annual March event.

Locals have devised numerous thematic competitions during the festival that all share a macabre humor. These include:

• Hearse races.
• Coffin races (six “pallbearers” carry a coffin with a live person in it, racing other groups through an obstacle course).
• A polar plunge.
• A game of rigid-human foosball played on a snowy field.
• A “brain freeze” contest (contestants race to finish frozen drinks).
• Frozen fish toss.
• Frozen turkey bowling.

The funereal fun is kept alive throughout the celebration with the help of Day of the Dead costumes, a live musical and a Blue Ball dance.

2. I’ve always been a big fan of “The Godfather” films, and recently came across some information related to the films I had never heard or read.

Mario Puzo, author of the best-selling book of the same name, pushed hard for Marlon Brando to play Don Corleone in the film. Fortunately, Puzo’s choice was accepted. Other possibles had been Danny Thomas and Ernest Borgnine. I could have seen Borgnine as Don Corleone, but Danny Thomas? 

3. Think Saudi Arabia is making progress in the area of basic human rights? (PUBLISHER’S NOTE: No. JRG)

Well, think again … here’s just a few of the laws still on the books in the desert kingdom (and remember, Saudi Arabia recently declared itself is a country that promotes human rights):

• If a woman is under the age of 45, she needs a special piece of electronic authorization (signed by a male guardian) to travel anywhere. Many women who are foreign travelers also need to be accompanied by a male guardian at all times. Women must always have a male chaperone in public.
• You could be executed in Saudi Arabia for being gay.
• In a lot of malls around the country, only families are allowed. Mall security will not permit a group of men, or a single man to enter alone without a woman with him. The mixing of single sexes at mall and restaurants can be deemed highly inappropriate. 
• The law in Saudi Arabia states that men must eat in men’s only sections of restaurants. Some restaurants “might allow women to eat by themselves in the family section, although this is mostly frowned upon,” says the travel website Expat Women. And a lot of restaurants only serve women alone as takeout – they are not allowed to sit in the restaurants alone.
• Movie theaters, up until recently, were prohibited unless located within private company compounds, the reason being the country did not want to allow women and men to mingle unsupervised which could lead to immoral actions outside the realm of marriage.
• In schools and universities, there are no gym classes or sports teams for girls. Saudi Arabia, however, is now faces a ban from the International Olympic Committee for never sending out female delegates.
• Non-Muslims must not worship in public in Saudi Arabia and there are also no houses of worship to cater to non-Muslims.
• Any other religion and mention of any other god is completely banned. Period. 
• Public gatherings of any kind are frowned upon, even birthday parties.
• There’s no clear set of rules for how criminals should be convicted, because there’s no legal code in the country. Instead, individual judges can decide on the punishments they’d like to dish out, and have total power over how they’d like a person to be sentenced.
• Punishments in Saudi Arabia are normally extreme, even archaic when you consider you can be executed via stoning. This could be a possible fate if you get caught committing adultery. Other extreme punishments include having your hands and/or feet cut off for stealing.
• Even blogging can land you in prison. One Saudi citizen was given 10 years in prison, as well as 1,000 lashings, after he blogged about free speech.
• The majority of Saudi buildings have separate entrances for men and women. And swimming pools.

Steve Thought O’ The Day — Wonder how “Frozen Dead Guy Days” would go over in Saudi Arabia?

Steve Eighinger writes daily for Muddy River News. Watching golf purists clutch pearls over the PGA Tour sellout is a popcorn-eating-worthy pleasure. They should take a mulligan. The Saudi’s might even permit that, even though Judge Smails won’t.