Daily Dirt: No tech skills, grilling and those poor, poor Cubs

Daily Dirt for Aug. 3, 2021: Nothing better to grill than those big boy hot dogs

It’s the first week of August, and those summer days are rapidly dwindling. V-neck sweaters will be here before we know it. While we’re waiting, enjoy Vol. 26 of your guilty pleasure, the Daily Dirt:

1. My own flesh and blood, son Geoff, categorized me as “mobilazy” when it comes to my cell phone and my constant requests about how to do technological type things. Damn kids.

2. What’s your favorite items to grill? In the Eighinger household the list is a short one, because I don’t know how to cook many things and the Little Woman doesn’t care to grill. So, in essence, here are the family faves:

A. Bratwurst: To me, a brat is little more than a big boy hot dog with a little spice thrown in for good measure. I love it when the brats crack open and start oozing brat juice all over the place. It reminds me of scenes from “The Walking Dead” after Norman Reedus or Jeffrey Dean Morgan has stabbed a zombie in the skull (Hey, remember, you have to kill a zombie’s brain or they just keep coming).

B. Hamburgers: Personally, I like the Roosevelt Grier style of hamburgers — BIG. The Little Woman only likes the petite Emlen Tunnell type burger, the kind you basically see through.

C. Hot dogs: The frankfurters must be Nathan’s. Nothing else will do. Case closed.

D. Shrimp: To be honest, I haven’t quite mastered these little fellows, but to list only three items would have been a little embarrassing.

3. According to the toptens.com, these are some of the worst things in the world to be:

1. Buried alive: Yeah, this would definitely be a nasty one.

2. Going to Jail for life: A lot would depend on your cell mate and the quality of cafeteria food.

3. Dying: Well, duh.

4. Listening to Justin Bieber: Good point. And may I add one more to the list to make it five?

5. Being a Cubs fan: After last week, maybe I should move this one up the scale a bit.