Daily Dirt: Not all marketing decisions prove to be wise ones

Daily Dirt for Jan. 4, 2022

Christmas is over … New Year’s is over … is your life back to normal yet? … If not, sit back, relax and welcome to today’s three thoughts that comprise Vol. 176 of the Daily Dirt.

1. Some more advertising slogans the powers-to-be should have probably reconsidered:

Gold medal: In 2011, the producers of “The Other White Meat” traded in their 24-year-old slogan in favor of “Pork, Be Inspired.” What’s that you say? You never heard it? Yeah, it wasn’t around long. I’m pretty sure that ad firm was canned.

Silver medal: Maxwell House turned Teddy Roosevelt’s comment about its coffee — “Good to the Last Drop” — into its official slogan for decades, and rightly so. It was a tremendous marketing tool. What followed was a tremendous failure: “Better Beans Make Better Coffee.” Yep, an immediate disaster. Seriously, what do some of these office pinheads think?

Bronze medal: In 2012, Pepsi unveiled its newest global slogan, “Live For Now,” much to the dismay of soda drinkers everywhere. Unlike “The Choice of a New Generation,” which presented a popular and youthful vibe, that new slogan sounded as if everyone’s days were numbered, according to the New York Post. No wonder, Coca-Cola is No. 1 … because “It’s the Real Thing”.

2. Found on Facebook today:

• “I got gas for $2.35 today. Unfortunately, I was at Taco Bell.” (I know, I know. Guys will love this, but women not so much.)
• “Live your life and enjoy bacon.” (Why do I laugh every time I read this?)
• “When in doubt, add bacon.”  ( … and this.)
• “In one of those moods where I want someone to pick me up and drive around all night, just listening to music and talking about life.” (Well, as long as we can work in a little classic Rod Stewart to the mix  …)
• “I was thinking about taking a part-time job at a bakery to make some extra dough.” ( … and on that note, let’s move to comment No. 3)

3. Five MLB team uniforms that need upgraded:

New York Yankees: Save me the “tradition” comments, those Yankee home uniforms should have been retired decades ago. And please put names on the backs. Please. (PUBLISHER’S NOTE: Almost as bad as the Prince take…almost. JRG)

Colorado Rockies: The Rockies’ sleeveless black tops are just pitiful.

Seattle Mariners: The M’s have never, ever, ever had a good-looking uniform combination. They just looked better when Ken Griffey Jr. was wearing them. (PUBLISHER’S NOTE: This take is correct. JRG)

Chicago Cubs: Like the Yankees, the Cubbies simply need a complete makeover. (PUBLISHER’S NOTE: The Cubs have an easy fix here. Go back to 1984. JRG)

Tampa Bay Rays: Since their inception, every Rays uniform — home and away — has looked like it emerged from the close-out section at Walmart.

Steve Fact O’ The Day
Steve prefers to have his toast cut in triangular fashion. And slathered with only strawberry jelly.

Steve Eighinger writes daily for Muddy River News. His uniform hasn’t changed much since 1984.