DAILY DIRT: There was no better leading animal than Arnold Ziffel

April 10, 2024 | By Steve Eighinger, Muddy River News Minister of Culture and Doctor of Love

Arnold Ziffel was one of the stars of "Green Acres".

**Daily Dirt for Wednesday, April 10, 2024**

But Mr. Ed was a close runner-up … Welcome to today’s three thoughts that make up Vol. 916 of The Daily Dirt.

1. Animals being featured on network television shows is nothing new.

But which ones are the most memorable?

How about this for a top-10 listing of the animals that made us laugh the most, or regularly tugged at our heartstrings?

1. Arnold Ziffel, the pig on “Green Acres”: Arnold was the “son” of Fred and Doris of Hooterville. I always thought Arnold, who liked to watch television, should have been provided with a bigger role.
2. Ed, the talking horse on “Mr. Ed”: Seriously, what wasn’t to love about a talking horse?
3. Flipper, the dolphin on “Flipper”: Flipper lived to the ripe old age of 40, dying in 1997.
4. Buck, the family dog on “Married … with Children”: Buck hated his masters, the Bundys, and spent almost every waking moment mocking them with his internal monologue.
5. Lassie, the Collie on “Lassie”: The basic plot of every episode was similar: bone-headed Timmy would get himself into some sort of trouble and it was up to Lassie to get him out of it. But there was something about watching that dog save the day that captured the hearts and minds of a generation of viewers.
6. Silver, the trusted steed of “The Long Ranger”:Before Batman and Superman hit the small screen, the Lone Ranger was the quintessential comic book hero for a legion of fans, and Silver added to his mystique. No animal could ever hope to be as cool as Silver.
7. Aristotle, the octopus on “The Addams Family”: The kids of “The Addams Family” had an array of strange pets in their house over the years, but none were as slimy or bizarre as Aristotle, Pugsley’s pet octopus.
8. Kitty Kat, the lion on “The Addams Family”:Another “pet” that had somehow been domesticated in “The Addams Family” home was Kitty Kat, a fully-grown lion that wandered through their spacious mansion.
9. Marcel, the monkey on “Friends”: The time Marcel humped Rachel’s stuffed animal is the stuff of TV legend.
10. Ben, the 650-pound black bear from “Gentle Ben”: Fortunately, Ben was rather docile.

2. Take me out to the ballgame?

Well, when that happens at the MLB level, we all know it’s going to be an expensive venture.

But that wasn’t always the case. Here’s a sample of some of the average prices back in 1967. Compare the following to what you will pay on your next trip to a Cardinals or Cubs game:

Hamburger: 50 cents
Pizza: 30 cents
Hot dog: 25 cents
Chicken basket: 85 cents
French fries: 25 cents
Soft drinks: 15 cents (25 cents for a large)
Coffee: 15 cents (25 cents for a large)
Peanuts: 25 cents
Popcorn: 25 cents
Potato chips: 25 cents
Iced tea: 20 cents
Premium beer: 55 cents

3. Matchup Tracker released some interesting college football information recently.

MT provided the all-time number of weekly appearances in The Associated Press top 10 rankings for each of the power conference programs:

1. Ohio State, 701: That number will be 702 after the first week of the 2024 season. The Buckeyes open against arguably the worst Division I program: Akron.
2. Oklahoma, 630: Somewhat surprising. I would have figured the Sooners would be behind Alabama, Notre Dame and Michigan.
3. Alabama, 627: Blame this “low” position on the Mike Shula years.
4. Notre Dame, 590: Irish open Aug. 31 vs. Texas A&M.
5. Michigan, 565: Wolverines play Texas and USC in the first month of next season.
6. Nebraska, 518: Cornhuskers are fortunate they weren’t always a member of the Big Ten or this total would have only been a fraction of what it is.
7. USC, 493: I wish USC would add player names to the back of its jerseys.
8. Texas, 467: One of the top five uniforms and helmets in all of college football.
9. Penn State, 412: Nittany Lions will open year with a month of creampuffs before facing UCLA and USC in back-to-back weeks in early October.
10. Florida State, 384: It seems like forever ago the Seminoles were a legit year-in, year-out national power.