Daily Dirt: Things to ponder during your next haircut … or your dog’s next haircut

Daily Dirt for Monday, July 17, 2023

Thought No. 3 might be the best comparison of dogs and cats ever … Welcome to today’s three thoughts that make up Vol. 667 of The Daily Dirt.

1. Have you ever wondered why your dog’s haircut costs far more than your own? Well, have you ever considered:

• Your hairdresser/barber doesn’t clean your rear end.
• You don’t go eight weeks without brushing or washing your hair.
• Your hairdresser/barber doesn’t remove boogies from your eyes.
• You don’t bite or scratch your hairdresser/barber.
• The likelihood of you pooping on your hairdresser/barber is pretty slim.
• Your haircut doesn’t include a manicure or pedicure.
• You sit still for your hairdresser/barber.
• Your hairdresser/barber only washes and cuts the hair on your head.

2. Fun fact: People born in the ’50s have lived in seven decades, two centuries and two millenniums. We had the best music, fastest cars, drive-in theaters, soda fountains and happy days. And we are not even that old yet. We’re just that cool.

3. Actual, factual signs found by The Daily Dirt investigative team:

• Gold medal: “Dogs Prepare You for Babies. Cats Prepare You for Teenagers.” Carroll County Veterinary Clinic, Carrollton, Mo.
• Silver medal: “Please Do Not Poop in the Rocks. We Can’t Believe We Had to Make This Sign.”  Eleven Mile Reservoir, Colorado.
• Bronze medal: “Don Not Pet the Fart Squirrels.” This popular sign is a warning to leave the skunks alone in many outdoor areas.

Steve Thought O’ The Day
I’ll never look at a skunk the same anymore.

Steve Eighinger writes daily for Muddy River News. Wonder if Steve cuts his own hair?