DAILY DIRT: Those husband-to-wife texts have taken on a new life

April 22, 2025 | By Steve Eighinger, Muddy River News Minister of Culture and Doctor of Love

I think it's safe to say what husbands often text to their wives is a private sort of language, or code. Photo by cottonbro studio/pexels

Daily Dirt for Tuesday, April 22, 2025

Unofficially, five of those six texts have been sent in the Eighinger household … Welcome to today’s three thoughts that make up Vol. 1,262 of The Daily Dirt

1. I think it’s safe to say what husbands often text to their wives is a private sort of language, or code.

Earlier this week, I came across a list of some of those “messages” that had been compiled some comic personality, and as I read through them I found myself nodding my head in agreement to most. Here are what I felt were the best of those texts:

WTF: “Where’s the food?”

BFF: “Bedroom? Feeling frisky?”

BS: “Bathroom smells”

NDF: “Not during football”

IDR: “Is dinner ready?”

FYI: “Forgot your instructions”

Men, always remember if you send your wife one of the above texts, ALWAYS follow it up with ILYSM (I love you so much). She can’t be mad at you after that. I’m pretty sure it’s a law or something.

By the way, how many times did you nod YOUR head in agreement?

2. Did you know (Part 340)

That actors Chuck Norris, Martin Sheen, Patrick Stewart and Nick Nolte are all now 84 years old.
That Jack Nicklaus won 15 majors, finished runner-up 19 times and had 56 top-five finishes. Tiger Woods’ numbers are 15, 7 and 33.
That there is an underwater post office in the South Pacific. Situated off the coast of Hideaway Island Resort and Marine Sanctuary is the Vanuatu Post, the world’s only under-the-sea post office. Vacationers who want to send a waterproof postcard home can snorkel or scuba dive 10 feet below the ocean’s surface. A special flag is raised above the water to indicate when postal workers are in the water.
That in Sweden, Cool Ranch Doritos are called “Cool American”. Swedish people don’t know what ranch flavor is, so the product goes by the name of “Cool American” instead, according to Snopes.
That New Zealand has more sheep than people. With a sheep population of 23.3 million compared to 5.2 million people, that means there are 4.4 sheep for every New Zealander.

3. I am fascinated by all the new flavors of potato chips that continually hit the market these days.

Apparently, some of those crazy combinations are not only found in the U.S. Here are some other wacky flavors I found from around the globe:

Nori Seaweed (Thailand): Reportedly tastes like “thick sheets of seaweed”. Not sure if that is a positive or negative.

Spanish Tomato Tango (India): “If ketchup were a chip … “

Green Pepper Spicy Hot Pot (Taiwan): Described as “sophistication and gastrological mastery in a chip”. Whatever that means.

Magic Masala (India): Described as an “earthy spice flavor”.

Roasted Garlic Oyster (China): Garlicky, fishy.

Sabor a Jamon (Spain): Much like our barbecue chips.

Roasted Cumin Lamb Skewer (China): Apparently the flavor is exactly what its name implies.

Sukhothai Coconut Curry (Taiwan): Reports indicate the curry outweighs the coconut.

Chicken Tomato (Mexico): A fresh tomato flavor, accented by a “great blend of spices”.

Cucumber (China): Reminiscent of a ranch flavor, I am told.

Steve Thought O’ The Day — The only one of those aforementioned flavors that even remotely interests me are those Sukhothai Coconut Curry chips. The key word here is “remotely”.