Daily Dirt: Walmart is always a wonderful place to visit, but I don’t buy bananas there

A day that includes a trip to Walmart is a day well-lived … welcome to today’s three thoughts that make up Vol. 164 of the Daily Dirt.

1. I love going to Walmart. Absolutely love it. I love all the stuff, plus the “interesting” people.

My wife and children are just the opposite. They don’t “care for the “congestion”. Whine, whine, whine. For the record, the wife and kids — all of whom are, by the way, adults —  are just the same when it comes to going to Hy-Vee or County Market. They’d prefer to sit home and order online. They got spoiled by the early months of the pandemic and now barely leave the house unless it’s absolutely necessary.

Not me, baby. I love to go up and down the aisles at Hy-Vee or County Market — unless all the products have been rearranged (are you listening, Hy-Vee on Harrison?) — and talk to friends, workers and general passers-by. I like to inspect new products, check out the pastries and see if the Coke or Mountain Dew are on sale. (Or one of my newest preferences, Squirt.)

But most of all, I love to roam the vastness of Walmart. There’s always something going on there. One of the most underrated areas to find entertainment is the frozen foods section. I’m always surprised by the amount of discussion over pizza preference or which frozen dinner is best. And I have no problem eavesdropping, especially when the husband-wife, boyfriend-girlfriend discussions get heated.

Walmart, however, is not perfect.

No matter how good of a time I may have shopping, I’m almost guaranteed to be ticked off before I leave because of the ridiculous checkout situation, where most days there are usually two (maybe three) aisles with real-live people manning cash registers. The lines are often long because most people (in my opinion) do not want to use the self-checkout aisles Walmart and other similar sites are trying to force on us.A personal note to whoever handles this situation at Walmart, Inc.

We don’t like it, and we’ll fight for our right for a real live cashier until the end of the earth. So wise up, Sam Walton wannabes and close down some of the self-checkout aisles and hire some more real live cashiers. Now.

2. Speaking of Walmart, here are the 10 most popular items — in terms of sales — according to querysprout.com:

• 1. Bananas: “It may come as a surprise, but bananas are Walmart’s most popular item and has been for ages. In fact, the company sells billions of bananas every year. This could have something to do with just how cheap bananas are from Walmart. Or, maybe it’s because extra bunches are often stocked by the checkouts to encourage shoppers to buy more. Whatever the reason, it is bananas that reign supreme out of Walmart’s 75 million products,” querysprout.com reports.
• 2. Toilet paper.
• 3. Slow cookers.
• 4. Televisions.
• 5. Google Chromecast.
• 6. Flushable wipes.
• 7. Disposable washcloths.
• 8. Paper towels
• 9. Insulated tumblers.
• 10. Pillows.
• (For those curious, No. 11 is crayons.)

3. I found these thoughts I felt applied to the recent spike in troubles associated with Covid:

Gold medal: “You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.” — Maya Angelou, American poet, memoirist and civil rights activist.

Silver medal: “I know without a doubt that our country and world will survive this pandemic. And just like our broken family, this broken world will be way more beautiful.” — Vicki Bunke, inspirational speaker.

Bronze medal: “Everything will be OK in the end. If it’s not OK, it’s not the end.” — the late John Lennon.

Steve Fact O’ The Day To his knowledge, Steve has never bought bananas at Walmart.

Steve Eighinger writes daily for Muddy River News. He is our man about town…and Walmart.