Daily Dirt: Will ‘No Time to Die’ surpass Bond death toll record of 196 in ‘You Only Live Twice’?

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Daily Dirt for Oct. 6, 2021
We’re getting closer to to Vol. 100 of the Daily Dirt. I hear Muddy River News Publisher J. Robert Gough is considering some sort of parade. We’ll just have to wait and see. In the meantime, welcome to Vol. 88 and three more thoughts:

1. We’re also moving closer to the U.S. debut of the new James Bond film, “No Timer to Die,” which opens in Quincy and Hannibal theaters TODAY. If you’re a regular reader of this space, you know that your loyal servant is a huge 007 fan. I’ve been attending Bond films since grade school — you HAVE to see 007 on the big screen the first time around — and consider the arrival of a new Bond offering secondly to Opening Day of baseball season.

One of the most intriguing elements of any Bond film is how bizarre some of the killings will be — and how many. Who can forget the death of Jill Masterson (Shirley Eaton), whose body was painted in gold, dying of skin asphyxiation? Who also can forget the 196 on-screen deaths in “You Only Live Twice”? We’ll get into some of the strange ways Bond villains — and the good guys, too — have perished in 007 movies, but today I’d simply like to provide the top 10 number of deaths in Bond films, which date to the early 1960s:

1. “You Only Live Twice (1967)”: 196 deaths,Sean Connery as Bond.

2. “The Spy  Who  Loved Me (1977)”: 147 deaths, Roger Moore as Bond.

3. “Thunderball (1965)”: 110 deaths, Sean Connery as Bond. (This was the first 007 film I saw in a theater. Thanks, mom and dad!

)4. “Moonraker (1979)”: 81 deaths, Roger Moore as Bond.

5. “Goldfinger (1964)”: 77 deaths, Sean Connery as Bond.

6. “GoldenEye (1995)”: 72 deaths, Pierce Brosnan as Bond.

7. “The World is Not Enough (1999)”: 70 deaths. Pierce Brosnan as Bond.

8. “A View to a Kill (1985)”: 62 deaths. Roger Moore as Bond.

9. “Octopussy (1983)”: 58 deaths. Roger Moore as Bond.

10. “For Your Eyes Only (1981)”: 54 deaths. Roger Moore as Bond.

Information on the number of Bond-related deaths was provided by The Guardian.

2. Keeping with the Bond theme today, let’s play a little overrated/underrated:

Most overrated Bond villains: Dominic Greene (“Quantum of Solace”), Hugo Drax (“Moonraker”), Dr. No (“Dr. No”).

Most underrated Bond villains: Ernst Stavro Blofeld (“You Only Live Twice”),  Auric Goldfinger (“Goldfinger), Elektra King (“The World is Not Enough”). Several actors have portrayed Blofeld, but the best was Donald Pleasance in “You Only Live Twice”.

PULISHER’S NOTE: Max Zorin is a glaring omission. Christopher Walken! C’mon, man… JRG.

3. A final Bond-related note today, concerning the 007 movie theme songs. Which ones were best? I thought you would never ask:

1. “Goldfinger,” by Shirley Bassey. Movie: “Goldfinger”.

2. “All-Time High,” by Rita Coolidge. Movie: “Octopussy”.

3. “Nobody Does It Better,” by Carly Simon. Movie: “The Spy Who Loved Me”.

4. “Live and Let Die,” by Paul McCartney and Wings. Movie: “LIve and Let Die”.

5. “For Your Eyes Only,” by Sheena Easton. Movie: “For Your Eyes Only”.

PUBLISHER’S NOTE: The correct order Bond film theme songs is:

  1. Live and Let Die: Really, Steve? Sir Paul takes a back seat to no one. And when that bass hits, it hits.
  2. Nobody Does It Better: Carly Simon could sing the alphabet and I’d listen.
  3. Goldfinger: Schmaltzy, but iconic.
  4. A View To A Kill: Duran Duran might be the most underrated group of the 80’s.
  5. Skyfall: Adele just crushes this like she does everything else.

Honorable Mention: Thunderball: Tom Freaking Jones, man!

And Sir Paul will take us home. JRG

Eighinger, Steve Eighinger writes daily for Muddy River News.

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